Haikus for Jews

Stolen from Haikus for Jews:

How soft the petals
of the floral arrangement
I have just stolen.

Left the door open
for the Prophet Elijah.
Now our cat is gone.

How can I atone
for scalping my tickets to
the High Holidays?

Why are we all about stealing packets of jam and maple syrup from brunch? I don't know, its just in our genes. Maybe one day we'll have no jam and 'll have no choice but to resort to using our well-stocked supplies.

Critical info for the NJ transplant

I used to be ashamed to tell people that I was from New Jersey, that is, until Garden State came out. Now I’m proud of my semi-suburban heritage. After moving to Manhattan, there was only one thing that I missed about NJ, the 7-Eleven. One of my earliest disappointments as a child was when the local 7-Eleven defected and recoined themselves "7-Twelve", selling Blurpees instead of Slurpees (I kid not). Happy was the day that 7-Eleven opened up on 23rd Street in Manhattan, yet it still does not show up on google maps (now there are 4 of them on the isle). So I mapped them with this great geocoding site, batchgeocode.com
Slurp away, just don't eat the strange, rotating meat-cheese things.

Because the phone book is for losers.

After Google Local recently failed me (there is no Gap store at 625 6th Ave #3, Google, but don’t worry, I still love you), I went to maps.a9.com to verify another address Google gave me. A9 had this great feature that let you see street level photos of the storefronts in popular cities, like Manhattan, and take a virtual sideways stroll down the big streets. To my shock, surprise, and dismay, maps.A9 closed shop from pressure from bigger rivals. Rumor is that Google Earth will include full textured 3-d renderings of buildings which would definitely out-cool A9’s functionality.
On the plus side, I found a map site, alkemis that shows some potential, if only they throw in some more nifty features on top of mapping movies and live traffic cams.

Fire, Flee, Foes, Escape!

I kinda want one, but not badly enough to wait in line in the rain/cold for 10 minutes, let alone 8 hours. I'm just excited to see a lot of disappointed people, a lot of clamoring, pushing, and shoving, and a couple of servers being knocked down by the online rush. Nothing like a little good, ol'-fashioned, human-caused chaos. Do games teach violence? Can't wait to see how this weekend compares to your average soccer riot.

Wild, Wild WoW

I overheard one of the network guys at work claiming that subscribing to World of Warcraft has really saved him a lot of money. His gaming budget used to be $3000 a year, now he's only spending $200 on the subscription plus the occasional single player game here and there.
Yet another reason why I should join.


P.S. When is Wired going to stop talking about Second Life already?

I'd rather eat (like) a caveman

Still haven't had the time to go into a whole tirade about organics, but today I saw the Food Liberation Inc on my corner wants me to check out its "new Raw Foods section!!"
If we can find something positive from this summer's E.Coli-in-spinich scare, it could be that the public was once again made aware of the danger of bacterial contamination in vegetables. This isn't the first time this has happened; lettuce (2005) and alfalfa (1997) are among the others that have also been subject to bacterial outbreaks. You know what kills bacteria in foods? Cooking. "But what about the nutrients?!" raw food aficionados cry, "Think of the nutrients we lose by cooking!" Turns out that the beta-carotene in carrots and the lycopene in tomatoes are actually more readily absorbed after cooking. What about vegetables that you want raw, like lettuce? Well, the CDC has a suggestion, but those shopping for raw foods aren't going to like it: it's Irradiation. Scary word isn't it? But the FDA has deemed it so safe that foods don't even need to be labeled if irradiated.
The idea is simple: all electromagnetic radiation is basically the same phenomenon, whether its radio waves or light or x-rays; from the moment they are generated (by electricity, chemical reactions, or nuclear decay) they travel away from their source at the speed of light. Some can pass though us with no effect, like radio waves. Some can not, like visible light. Microwaves can cook by exciting molecules without disrupting them, generating heat. In irradiation, we are utilizing the ability of UV, X-rays, or Gamma rays to disrupt certain bonds in DNA. Biology is dependant on a chemical's precise structure, and when a structure is changed, its function is usually lost. Exposing the food to radiation damages bacterial DNA so that it can not replicate or express genes. It will also inactivate plant DNA, which will stop the plant from doing any more chemistry. DNA is not a nutrient; it just stores the codes for making proteins and replication; we don't lose anything by inactivating it. The radiation passes right through and can not be stored in the food any more than you can catch and store light. Yes, we must protect ourselves from being exposed to DNA damaging radiation (limit x-ray exposure [don't star in x-ray movies] and stay out of the sun), but we do not need to protect our foods. We do need to protect ourselves from food-borne illnesses in meats and vegetables and most importantly, we do need to protect ourselves from ignorance.

And cancer, stroke, heart-attacks, obesity...eat your veggies!

NYC: Dont Walk

NYC: Dont Walk,
originally uploaded by wallyg.

Anyone know why Park Av is missing its Don't Walk signs in the high 40s, low 50s? I don't know exactly which intersections are missing the signs because they are also missing their street signs. I have two theories:
1. Its a ploy by the MTA to use the otherwise mostly useless, underused, $112 million dollar Northeast passage of Grand Central Terminal ?
or or or
2. Its part of the Waldorf=Astoria's grand plan to make visitors so afraid of stepping out of the hotel that they a. take a cab or bus tour anywhere they go or b. resign themselves to eating in the hotel? (How else could they get by on charging $19 for bagels and lox? )

What do you think? Are these actually crazy enough to work?

Do I have a chance at my lifelong dream of conspiracy-theory blogging?

Michael J. Fox Lives On...

It's been ten days since his initial TV ad, yet he's still in the news. I guess Anderson Cooper is getting bored with Iraq and has decided that its time to hug Fox. If I hear another analogy to explain to us how adult stem cells differ from embryonic stem cells, I think I'm going to shoot a CNN SENIOR MEDICAL CORRESPONDENT.

The WholeFoods Agenda, part I

I've got to hand it to Men's Health on their recent article on Frankenfoods, genetically-modified-organisms, or whatever scary name you want to call them. Its about time that accurate reporting replaces fear and ignorance about this important issue.
I first read about organics and GM-foods in this great book I got from the library, Mendel in the Kitchen. I highly recommend it for its fairly simple language and its engaging, historical narrative of American agriculture. This book has me so convinced that biotech is the right thing, I have trouble believing that this book has been out for 2 years and the myth of that organics as better for us is still strong.
I'm going to repeat some of the points the book in my next post, so stay tuned.